Rosh Hashana and Yom Kippur

I know, I know it's been a while since I wrote last but the last three weeks or so have been really hectic. Over that time I've done so much and have definetly learned a lot.

As the weeks go by, we as a group are given more responsibility. As I look back at the progress that I have made in only seven weeks it seems crazy now the amount of responsibility they give us. Two weeks ago, we started shavua hagnach, which is a week where it is our plugahs turn to guard the base. After spending the day in the kitchen (once again), it was my machlakas to guard the base. They are different stations set up and we take turns guarding. The way it works is that you guard for two hours and are off for the next four. The two hours that you are guarding you are not allowed to sit, you can’t drink anything but water, you are not allowed to eat, and you have to stay awake. If you sit down or do any of those things it is considered “breaking shmirah” and then you must suffer the consequences (i.e. having to spend Shabbat on the base).

My first shmirah went well. I was really excited to actually do something for other people and use some of the things that I learned in training. I was lucky because during almost half of my shmirah I had to help one of the heads of the base put up a guard tower because they were switching the one that was at my post, which made it much easier. As the hours past and it was time for my second shmirah, I was chosen to guard one of the posts that was far away from people, which made it difficult because when there are people around there’s a possibility that they’ll come by and you can talk to them. So this time there weren’t any people, fine, so Ill be alone. The thing that made it worse was that it was in the middle of the night after our mifakdim made us run around with people on our backs as punishment for what someone did earlier in the day. As I walked towards my post I was kind of tired, actually I was pretty tired. I walked up towards the steps and took my post. This being the first time that I was in a tower, so it was exciting at first. The time past (I didn’t know how long because a trick I was taught was to not look at your watch), so it wasn't as bad as I thought.

The week ended off with Rosh Hashana. For weeks I was trying to get out of the army for the holiday. I figured it would be really depressing because Rosh Hashana, at least for me, is a time where my whole family is together. My sister and her family usually come home because who wants to be in Montreal for Rosh Hashana when you can go to LA and choose from ten minyanim with ten seats in every minyan. So I tried to use the chayal boded excuse saying that there is a rule that we are not allowed to be closed for Rosh Hashana. After weeks of trying I found out that a rule does exist but not for people in basic training. By the Thursday before the chag I accepted the fact that I would be staying in. Yes it was hard but I decided to have an upbeat attitude and assumed it would be fun.

As the time was getting closer and they started "noel Shabbos" (i.e. litterally locking shabbos - a time where the army starts shabbos and lets you be free and take a shower and get ready and it lasts until after shabbos; basically the time where the mifakdim don't yell at you and give you a "peaceful" shabbos).   As I began to prepare for yom tov, already it felt different. Besides receiving a massive package form my parents (thank you it was awesome!) and having every person in my pluga come over to my bed and stare at my 12 bottles of soda, two 10 pound bags of nuts, 3 massive boxes of cookies (massive as in two feet by 1 feet) and two more boxes of full of snacks, I had gotten dressed in my uniform, not my suit. Before I made my way towards shul I took a moment to take in what was going on, for the only white garment was my undershirt and kipah. With my gun and all I went to shul. I was chazan for mincha and the kabalat shabbat for yom tov. That first night was really nice, a little bit unusual, but it was good. We had all of the simanim, I brought my own honey, and all of us ate together and tried to make the best of my situation. The rest of the evening was much different than all other years as I had guard duty at night (which was good because I was able to go to shul the next day).

The next day I was a toran in the kitchen, where I had to help set up and arrange the dining area and help clean. Instead of being dressed in my ceremonial uniform I had to wear my work uniform. I felt a little weird but remembered that I was in the army and this is what they needed me to do. The guys in the kitchen were really nice and let me go to davening which was again a little different than other years but still very nice. The Rabbi of the base brought in a Rabbi, who happened ot be a father of one of the soldiers on the base and he was chazan for both days musaf. He helped bring a lot of ruach and simcha to our Rosh Hashana on base. 

Being that there were many irreligious soldiers, I was given the opportunity to sit with a few of them and show them the tefilot. It made them really happy to say the tefilot and hear the shofar. 

As Yom Tov ended, we quickly had to change and start another week in the army. The week went well as we learned about different guns and jobs that could be assigned to us. We also became cirtified in first aid. The cirtification was pretty interesting as we learned how to be a first response in the case of emergency. I'll tell you this, never have someone put a tirnicit on you, it hurts, a lot. The week ended with another masa, our first with the stretcher opened with someone on it. It was a rather easy masa but a good end to a long week. By Thursday night, our mifakdim began to ask for volunteers for Yom Kippur. By this time I had prepared and arranged Yom Kippur. I knew where I was going to have my seuda hamaphsekes, where I was going to daven and how I was going to prepare on the Sunday before. I figured that the non religious guys would want to stay because it's an easy day to volunteer as they would be fasting anyways and not be going to shul. After no one decided, two people were chosen. The first one picked was a guy who had to be on base anyways because of a punishment. The second guy was someone who had to stay because he left for Rosh Hashana. When I found out who the second guy was I began to realize that it wasn't right for him to stay. He had to go home for Rosh Hashana because his grandfather was sick, and unfortunetly died right after. I began to feel like I had to step up and take one for the team. It was killing me that this guy, who's parent was sitting shiva, had to stay on base becasue he wasn't able to stay in before because of his sick grandfather and now he unfortunetly lost his grandfather and is in a time where family is the up most important thing, has to stay in, I volunteered right then and there. I knew it would be hard but that is why I am in the army. I am here to help and try to make a decision.

My decision came somewhat blind as I soon found out that we wouldn't have a minyan. I reasoned that it was more important to help out a friend and daven byechidus (i.e. without a minyan, then daven at yeshiva feeling terrible for that guy who had to stay in). So I went home for shabbos and had a really nice shabbos. I spent it with a lot of my friends and had a really good time. Saturday night was very hectic. I had to do kapaarot, say slichot, and finish preparing for yom kippur, oh ya, and have the chulent melave malke that we forgot to eat over shabbos. So right after shabbos we made our way to mea shearim and did kaparot with a chicken (I will spare the details for those with light stomachs). We then came back to the apartment and had some chulent, which I must say was pretty good. By 12:30, I was packed for the next day, so we made our way over to the kotel to say slichot. Little did we know it was the one night where Rav Ovadia Yosef (one of the head sfardi Rabbis) was at the kotel saying slichot. I have never seen the kotel that packed. You couldn't move. There were thousands of people. We used our army id's to make it passed the security line and fought our way to the crowd to enter the kotel plaza. As we tried to go down to the wall, a group of guys stopped us and asked up to join their minyan and be chazan. I took the initiative and began the slichot. After the kadish they said this is a sfardi minyan. Now, the last time I said sfardi slichot was in Maimonides and it was only a few paragraphs. The problem was that I had to do it because we already started and also, these guys needed help. So I took their siddur and began. Some of the tunes came back to me and most of the paragraphs are said out loud. Even though ashkenazi slichot erev yom kippur are short, the sfardi version was very long. We ended by 2:30, which was actually 1:30 because they changed the clocks, but I had to be on base early and wake up by 4:30. Because of the multitudes of people that were at the kotel, it took me a very long time to get back. We arrived at the apartment by 3:00. I called some friends in the states and went to sleep for the next our until I had to daven and make my way down to beer sheva to go to my base. 

I finally made it to my base, which, by this time, it was completely empty. Luckily, the Rabbi was present with people to make a minyan for us. With there being only 6 guys in my machlaka closed for Yom Kippur, the guarding was divided into 2 horu slots, meaning that we would have to guard 2 out of every 12 hours. A list was made and I switched to have shmirot so that I would only have to guard during at night and I could go to shul during the day. 

As the time drew closer towards Yom Kippur, things were already not as they usually were. I had to daven mincha and eat the seuda hamaphsekes myself because I was guarding. Then, 30 minutes before candle lighting, the one other yeshiva guy present told me that I was davening musaf. Musaf Yom Kippur is not a simple thing. Besides the prayer of hineni before and taking on the responsibility of the entire kahal, I remembered that it is one of the longest and most difficult tefilot of the year. I realized that I had to do it because we would only have eleven people (barely a minyan), and I would have to help out because of the lack of religious people on the base. 

Kol nidrey started and it was very different. The Rabbi decided to daven sefardi for kol nidrey, maariv, mincha, and neila, and leave shacharit and musaf to the two yeshiva guys to daven ashkenaz. The sfardi davening was a very good experience because it was a very good way to see the different sides of Judaism and be exposed to the different ways in which people plray to Hashem. After kol nidrey I decided to go to bed a little early because I had four hours of guarding ahead of me and needed to be awake for the davening the next day. I took a nap for an hour and began my guard duty. It was very difficult because we had all of the regulations of guarding where you have to obey by all of the rules, except they allowed us to sit down. I woke up early the next day to practice the davening. As time passed and it was getting closer to musaf, I began to get really nervous. I don't think I was ever so nervous in my life. It felt like one of those moments before a final in school where you are freaking out because you think you haven't studied enough and are confident that you are going to fail. I put on the kitel (which had to be one of the wierdest parts of it all) and made my way towards the bimah. With the sweat dripping down my face, trying to catch a breath I began the heart wrenching hineni and kadish. Throughout the reciation I glanced at the English words and realized the yolk I was accepting upon myself. I finished the words of the kadish and began one of the most meaningful musafs in my entire life. 

Looking back at it now I am really happy I stayed in for both Rosh Hashana and Yom kippur. I spent the High Holidays with many different types of people from many different backgrounds. I feel that I really grew from my unusual experiences and was able to take a lot out of it. I would have to say that the week that followed could not be more appropriate as I officially became 03 in my training, which means that I have the ability to guard yeshuvim around Israel and have advanced in my training with the throwing of a grenade (which was a blast). 

If you were to ask me to stay for another Rosh Hashana and Yom kippur on an army base I would definitely say yes. It was probably the most meaningful service of my service thus far.